Friday, May 21, 2010

Spiral

I was late to the clinic and
my adjustment counselor was pissed.

Wasn't that just like me?
On account of my oppositional complex.

I just had to stop for that quick hit
in the drive-thru alley with the junkies.

But if Daddy hadn't screwed up my order
I wouldn't have had to shoot up twice.

I'd sleep on a feather mattress
instead of this old gym-mat.

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Comments:
Great prose poem.

Reads like Blackboard Jungle II, the addict who thought he was just a tourist in addiction--whoever the author of that one was.
Write tight, I say.

And you did.
Wonderfully
 
I only hope that it's not a self-portrait. ;-)
 
Very, very nice and TomCat cracked me up with his comment
 
So many people blame daddy... and maybe it's true.

But are we really doomed to a spiral like that?

Sure, you may have written this in metaphor (probably), but the daddy line and the final line tie a meaning up for me that does ring true... we can break the spiral, but it won't be so until we understand why we have walked that path and know that it is our own feet that carry us down it's twists and turns. Our own feet that will have to turn around and walk a line back out of the morass.

Just my thoughts.

Good to see you as well, sir.
 
Benji- this was evocative and very thought-provoking - agree with ivan !!!! i tend to be an over-emotional person and it brought a tear to my eyes -in my personal life (friends and family) I know so many folks whose lives have been utterly destroyed by addiction- I also drank excessively for many years (which probably explains a lot eh?:-)
sorry I missed this wonderful work of yours by so much - been really down lately and lazy- trying to get out of it - i have always enjoyed your work enormously - blessings to you and your beautiful family!!!!
 
ps Benji - wrt to the Ursula K LeGuin quote above- just wanted to say that you are indeed an artist - and don't let anyone tell you any different!!
 
Thanks all, wrote this in a workshop for people considering adoption - lots of stories like this one, complete with "adjustment councillors". Not all are doomed to such spirals but it happens a lot - a depressing lot.
 
This was short sharp and to the point.

Inject me!
 
I'm a fan of the short form myself.
 
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